Row, row, row your boat.

The strangest of things always seem to happen to me right before I take a mental health day.

To start things off though, I would like to post a picture of my new portrait (the paper on top) drawn by G. I think it just adds a certain je ne sais quoi about me. Don't you think?

... at least I'm in my make-believe Butterfly Garden! :) I do think it's funny even when my skin color is different, my hair and pants are still the same. Awww, they know me well. :D

Thursday was such a day where anything and everything seemed to occur. Let's start off with the morning...

In Reading Remediation group, J and T kept playing around and not being serious at all; there's a time to play and a time to work hard (especially since these are the main two who are at risk of not passing second grade). I told them sternly that they needed to get their student faces on. So they said, "Yeah, we're going to get our student faces on!" And then they motion as if they were washing their faces...

And then T burst out with... "Yeah, my student face! I need to get some lotion on!"

Right after this incident, I asked them questions about "So what do you need to see?" They called out, "Eyes! Glasses!" Right. Then I asked them, "What do you need to speak?" J replied, "SPEECH BUBBLES!"

And then the day continued.

Now, I have started a collection of confiscated items. These items range from little papers, scissors used to cut up crayons and erasers, toys, etc. The best item thus far is apparently a "love potion." According to one student, G created this "potion" to "get girls to like him." Well, ladies and gentlemen, get your pencils ready because I'm about to divulge the secrets of a true 21st-century aphrodisiac.

• A small hand sanitizer bottle
• Three broken crayons (can be of any color, preferably pink and purple)
• Questionable water
• A little plant from outside

That's it! You will attract the masses in no time. People will flock at your feet and swoon immeasurably.

The day carried on and was interrupted by a serenade of "Row, row, row your boat" emanating from the boy's bathroom. A very LOUD crooning. Mrs. A and I looked at each other and went "What the?!" as we went to explore.

"Who's in there?!" I called.
No answer.
"Get out here right now!" I called out again.
K peeked his head out and I literally want to smack my and his forehead.
"What are you doing?! Do you realize the entire pod can hear you?? When you get out, just go change your name to red!"

[Note: Our behavior system is a stoplight. Red, yellow, green. You can infer what red is.]

K stomped out of the bathroom and started wailing, putting on another Moaning Cow show.

I pulled him aside and again asked (with the greatest self-control possible... since I was on the verge of laughter from the ridiculousness of the situation), "What were you thinking?? The entire pod was disrupted!"

"I didn't do it!" K wailed.
"Who else was in there?! You were the only one, K!"
"I..." he quieted.

So it wasn't until the end of the day when another situation occurred. At this point, I was apparently on a roll with making children cry. Since a little before this at lunch, I made one of Mrs. A's students sit by himself at lunch because he kept getting up, talking to other tables, and walking around. He had the most unattractive crying face I've ever seen. I'm becoming the recipient of "Death Stares" a little too numerously. :P

Anyway, so at the end of the day, I was finishing up typing something on the computer while the kids finished our Cheez-It area activity. (Find the area of some squares with Cheez-Its! They loved it.)

I just happened to turn around and in slo-mo, DS, T, and T stared at me, frozen. DS held his hand over his mouth. T had the guilty look as she openly clutched three Hot Fries in her fist. T was in mid-reach of taking one. I was SHOCKED. We stared at each other for a moment until I got up and asked what in the world was going on.

Their blatant defiance/sneakiness of the "no snacks unless I provide them and there is enough for everyone" rule was just so SHOCKING to me. I was sitting RIGHT there!

Well, I told them to throw them away. T got up and threw her three away. DS stared at me, wondering if I were serious.

"Throw them away NOW."

He got up and walked to his Spongebob backpack (which was clearly past the trashcan), shoving them inside.

"NO. I said THROW them away in the trashcan!"

He stared at me as if he didn't understand English and were weighing the consequences if he didn't follow instructions.

"Throw them away NOW. You KNOW the rules."

I said this about ten times. Quickly, his face transfigured into one of anger as he took his Hot Fries out of his backpack and slammed them into the trashcan. DS stomped his feet in a circle and then the grand finale was when he threw his body to the ground and started wailing. Mrs. W came in and swooped him up to talk to him in another room.

It's like a drama in my classroom. There's always something.

The weirdest ending was when some boys were trying to go into the trashcan to retrieve these Hot Fries, even after I pushed my foot down in the trashcan because it was overflowing with paper. And the Hot Fries were clearly not theirs to even take.

And thus, this ends my week. I've probably traumatized some kids for life... but at least now I know that broken crayons in a hand sanitizer bottle is the key to a romantically successful life.

- Miss Chelsea :)

Spring has almost sprung.

Just in case you didn't already know, I really don't like losing an hour of my sleep to save energy for the next 6 months. Sure, it's a grand idea and all... but one hour!! Sleep!! Okay, so I'm not completely an energy hog... but tomorrow is going to be a roooough morning.

The kids have been wired for the past two weeks, and it's exhausting. I waste about 45 minutes to an hour every day refocusing and dealing with behavior issues. It's getting ridiculous. I think we all need Spring Break like now.

Some adorable quotes kept me smiling though.

"What does a seed do or need, S?"
"All it needs is, uh, a little water, soil, and a little love."

"So, K, do you feel older and bigger today?"
"Uh huh. [sage nod]"
"That's great! Do you still have the same amount of eyes?"
"Yep, 4. Just like you!"
"How about ears?
"[sage nod] And I can smell real well! Like a gorilla!"

I'm going to Miss P's home state of Iowa for Spring Break! I'm pretty excited about it since I've never been. The flight was really affordable, and I may get to go on some random factory tours. Wooooo hoo. Watch out, corn fields!

I haven't been staying late at school much lately. Neither are the other teachers really... we're just too tired to want to think about the next day. So on a good healthy note, I've been balancing life a lot better than before. It helps that I have my own place to come home too... there's more incentive to flop into my own bed, lounge on my own (well, Miss EB's) couch, bake in my own (well, landlady's) oven. It's wonderful.

C's coming out for my Easter party, too, and so I may be taking a Mental Health Day on Friday... just so I can A) get ready for the party and B) relax a little bit.

Once Spring Break passes, I know I'm going to be counting down the days until summer... there are a lot of things being planned... and Mr. R and I may be doing a California Road Trip and then attend T's brother's wedding (we all never would have thought he'd ever get married.. he's surprised himself! haha). I have to be in Texas by July 10th for SIG. I believe Miss J is working there this year too, so at least I'll know someone.

Anyway, I want to go bum around and fiddle with gadgets...

Until next time,
Miss Chelsea :)

Memorable quotes.

For your reading pleasures, I have collected some pretty great quotes from the past few weeks.

(Side note- It's been a hectic few weeks... lots of school stuff and then the VEA weekend thing was awesome (I did learn how to ski, and it only took about 3 fallings!)! If you have access to Facebook as well as my profile, then you can check out my pictures from there.)

(Another EXCITING side note- our Painted Lady butterflies finally hatched today! When I left school, we were still waiting for the sixth one to hatch. The sixth's chrysalis was getting darker and darker though, so it's bound to be out by tomorrow. We're hoping! We will be releasing the 'flies out into its natural environment on Friday. They need to make babies so the life cycle can happen over all again! ;) )

"All right, it's time for the butterfly video!"
[Magic School Bus theme song begins]
... from the corner of my eye, J (from Ms. T's) rose his arms and started grooving to the song, pumping his fists in the air. This kid NEVER talks or moves much... but here he was just rockin' it up to MSB. I love him and I want to adopt him.

"This is for you, Miss F! I told you I'd bring it!"
- A, gave me a Valentine's heart with a fake rose and bear. Two weeks after the famous heart holiday.

"Miss F, can I go home with you? I wanna be a white person! They have more fun and they laugh more."
- T

"What else can you use a measuring tape for?"
"My mom uses it when she works out!"
- M

"[hand on my arm] Miss F, your monarch butterflies are just so beautiful."
- B, from Ms. R's class
[One-- she randomly came up to me at lunch to say this. Two-- They are Painted Ladies, not Monarchs. lol Sooo adorable!]


So that's it for now until the weekend. I needed to appease the M's on the west coast with an update. I can't have completely ruined her week!! I must repent and ask forgiveness for such negligence. ;)

Miss Chelsea :)